Craziness going on...

So i'm finding it a little harder to blog these days. I don't really have anything nice and flowery to say and who wants to write about depressing stuff all the time? I've been calling doctors offices literally all day today and have been either turned down or had to leave a message on an answering machine every time. I think i've reached a point with my thyroid disease that something has to be done. At the beginning of this year (it actually started when i was first pregnant) i started feeling my heart racing. I would take my pulse and my hr would be above 120. It is a very scary experience. Last week when we were supposed to be leaving to go home to visit i was having pressure in my chest. Like somebody was pushing down really hard on it. When i wasn't having that feeling i felt like a stabbing pain in my chest. Kinda like if you've been running and then try to breathe deeply. Chest pain really freaked me out. I canceled our trip and on Friday i went in to urgent care to get it checked out. I felt like i was winded all day. Like i couldn't catch my breath. The doctor checked my oxygen level and it was fine. They ran an ekg on my heart and it looked fine. He told me he thought these feelings were related to my thyroid and the only way to help rid me of them is going to be to slow my thyroid down (aka radio-active iodine). I'm at a point now where i'm just about ready to feel better. The bad part is i don't know if killing my thyroid will help me feel better. I don't know if there's something else going on in my body making my thyroid act up. I have read about your hormones being out of whack and that affecting your thyroid but good luck trying to find a doctor who wants to check in to that! I take that back. I did find one clinic today that gave me an appointment with their doctor and they do bioidentical hormone replacement but of course it's not covered by insurance. I have an appointment for Monday to meet with the doctor and ask some questions. I also got my blood drawn today and will hear from my endocrinologist in 4 or 5 days to see what my tsh levels are. It is very frustrating to know there's all this craziness going on in my body and it seems like i can't find a doctor to take me seriously or find anyone who has any answers.  As of right now i don't know which one i'm dreading more, my doctor saying my thyroid's out of whack again or him telling me there's nothing wrong and my levels look fine. I think if he tells me everything looks fine i might just break down on him. Anyways, that's what's going on in my life right now and why i don't have much to blog about lately. I would appreciate your prayers that i can find somebody who's willing to investigate and figure out what's causing all this. I realize nobody feels perfect and i accept that i never will but there's got to be something better than what i've got going on right now