First week of speech...

So we've completed our first week of speech therapy. It's amazing how adding just one small thing to our usually empty schedule makes me feel super busy (lol). I had actually called the school last week to find out what kind of time line they were looking at for beginning the program. I wanted to make sure they hadn't forgotten about us or lost Jakob's paperwork in the shuffle (things like that tend to happen around here). The speech therapist assured me they hadn't forgotten about us. The school had acquired a new portable for speech and it didn't have smoke alarms or air conditioning. Seeing as how it's now a couple of days from October and it's still 93-94 degrees and muggy outside air conditioning is a must. She told me they'd be ready to start the program on Monday@ 9:00am. Thankfully Jakob woke up so easily Monday morning (which is rare, he's usually super grouchy if I wake him up) and ate his breakfast right up. I kinda dressed him up a little since it was his first day and styled his hair :) I know he can be a handful sometimes so I wanted the therapist to at least think he's super adorable...sometimes that makes up for the stubbornness, believe me, I know from experience. We arrived at the school about 8:50 and someone from the office showed us where the building is. 9:00 passed. Then 9:05. Finally the therapist came out and said that the other two children who were supposed to come didn't show. She asked me to come in with Jakob. I was really looking forward to 30 minutes of reading a book or browsing facebook uninterrupted, in 30 minutes I could even write a blog! I was also looking forward to letting someone work with Jakob without me being there. You know how sometimes kids are so much easier to work with when mom or dad aren't around. Well Monday that was not to be. We sat in the floor and the therapist tried to get Jakob to say words like "more", "please"and "all done." These are all words that I know he can say. Sometimes he even uses them at home, but usually not when you tell him to. We're working on please but pretty much the only time he'll say please is when he wants his shirt off (he'll say "off please") or if he really wants a snack he'll say "cookie please" or "cheerios please." Jakob was much more interested in all the boxes and bins of toys on every shelf than just sitting down and playing with one thing. Eventually she brought out a bag of tiles and there were pictures on them. She layed one down in front of Jakob and said "dog" and he said "dog" she looked at me like (yay!) then she said "ladybug" and he said "ladybug" she did a couple more and he repeated then she said "plane" and laid down an airplane tile. Jakob didn't say it. She said "oh, you don't want that one" and took it away. When she took it away Jakob said "airplane" and she was very happy with that. Anyways, day one was pretty much just Jakob getting to know Miss Blackburn and Miss Blackburn getting to know Jakob.
On Wednesday we showed up about 10 mins early again. This time another lady came walking up with a young boy by the hand. I figured this is probably one of Jakob's "friends" that will be taking speech with him. The lady and the boy were conversing in Spanish. (There is a large immigrant population in our town. There are a lot of children at this elementary school getting speech therapy just to learn to speak English. When we went on Wednesday there was a girl about 8 or 9 years old learning English words.) The new child in Jakob's speech therapy doesn't speak much English at all. He's about 3 years old just like Jakey. When Jakob saw him he got the biggest smile on his face and ran up to him. Everything this little boy did Jakob did. Everywhere this little boy went Jakob wanted to go also. I was sitting there hoping that they would encourage each other to participate and not the other way around. This time the boys went in without their moms. After the therapy was done the teacher came out and said both boys did very well. She said she learned with Jakob when he's being whiny she has to use a firm voice and tell him to stop and he'll stop. She said when Jakob would fuss the other little boy would pat his back and say "oh,it's ok" which is good for the other little boy too because he's learning to speak to others in English. Anyways, our first week of speech went very well and I think it's going to be a big help to Jakey.

Also, I got the ok from the cardiologist. My heart is healthy and strong. Thank goodness for that news. The doc said he's fairly certain my thyroid issues are causing the heart pains/palpitations. Jeremy applied for a job back home (not with his previous employer) and another one is supposed to open soon. There's also an opening coming near St. Augustine for Jeremy's current employer so we're kind of excited that we may be able to move away from here soon!!! Just praying about it and trying to be patient. Thanks for the prayers. Please remember to pray for my friend Dana as she's going through IVF again and trying for another baby.

Just some ramblings...

So nothing unusual or special is going on around here right now, but I promised I'd blog more, so here goes...

When Jakob turned 3 he officially left the nursery at church and moved into his own Sunday school class, the "children's church" and "kids for truth" on Wednesday nights. Me and Jeremy were very nervous about him being in classes that tend to be more structured, but so far (he's only had 2 weeks) he's doing very well. Yesterday we found out that he hit a little boy and spit on a little girl in children's church so we had to have a talk about that, but he is learning how to treat other people (and how not to) so I'm happy about that. He didn't get any candy after class because he was a naughty boy...I think that may get to him faster than any punishment we will give him. Lol.

We are still suffering through, enjoying, tolerating 90+ degree temps down here. Since hurricane Isaac graced us with his presence we have had a horrible time with mosquitoes. We are very thankful that it waited until the end of August for the mosquitoes to get bad though. I have put the pool away for the summer because when the mosquitoes finally leave it will be too cold to play in the pool. I am very thankful we have a large lanai (in the south we call them back porches:) so Jakob can play back there and not get eaten alive by bugs. I can't wait for cooler weather. I honestly think about it almost every day. I am eagerly awaiting the time when I can turn off the air condition, open all the windows and enjoy the fresh air....and as an added bonus all the mosquitoes will be dead too :) 

We had someone contact us about our property that we own in Mossy Head. I don't know if you remember this or not but when we were first married we bought a piece of property, intending to flip it in a year or two and make a little money off of it. When two years passed and we were getting ready to sell it we got into a big dispute with the next door neighbor (he tried to claim he owned the entrance to our land and fenced it off) and we ended up having to sue the neighbor just to get access to our own property. By the time it was all said and done the market had crashed and we couldn't sell the property anymore. Somebody is interested in buying it. I'm not getting my hopes up too much, but the good thing is we can sell it or we can't. We don't have to sell it, but it'd be nice. We'll see what happens with that. 

Any day now a job is supposed to be advertised back home at JG. Of course we have a lot of skepticism about whether Jeremy could get it or not. We've had our hopes up more than a couple times with them and nothing ever works out. We will just keep praying about it and hoping that now is the time to move back home.

I have been wearing a heart monitor for the last 17 days. I only have four days left. I cannot even express over the internet how happy I will be when this thing is finally off of me! I am also glad the doctor will have a larger picture of what my heart is doing. Still pretty sure all the pains are symptoms from my thyroid but I guess we'll see. My appt. with the cardiologist is on the 25th.
 
Can you even believe we're halfway through September??? I can't. It's hard to believe fall is almost here when you live this far south. One thing that really stinks living here is that the leaves never change colors. Everything stays green until about January and then grass turns brown, lots of bushes and stuff turn brown but the trees stay green. No fall colors here :( 
 I've been researching low carb pumpkin nut muffins because reading on FB of everyone's pumpkin obsessions is making me hungry :) 
Well, I just ran out of things to talk about...so I'm done now ;)

Love, Me

Things that make you go hmmm...

Well, guess what? I went to the Dr on Wednesday and he told me I don't have high cholesterol. That's right. One month ago he told me I do have high cholesterol, put me on the smallest dose of cholesterol lowering meds and a month later I tested half as high as I did the first time.The doctor says there's no way that in one month that small of a dose dropped my cholesterol that much. So I'm off the meds for about 3 months and then I'll get tested again. Somebody's test was wrong. Hoping it's the first one :)

The hurt and the healer...

"The Hurt & The Healer"

Why?
The question that is never far away 
But healing doesn’t come from the explained
Jesus please don’t let this go in vain
You’re all I have
All that remains

So here I am
What’s left of me
When glory meets my suffering

I’m alive
Even though a part of me has died
You take my heart and breathe it back to life
I fall into Your arms open wide
When the hurt and the healer collide

Breathe
Sometimes I feel it’s all that I can do
Pain so deep that I can hardly move
Just keep my eyes completely fixed on You
Lord take hold and pull me through

So here I am
What’s left of me
When glory meets my suffering

I’m alive
Even though a part of me has died
You take my heart and breathe it back to life
I fall into your arms open wide
When the hurt and the healer collide

It’s the moment when humanity
Is overcome by majesty
When grace is ushered in for good
And all our scars are understood
When mercy takes its rightful place
And all these questions fade away
When out of the weakness we must bow
And hear You say “It’s over now”

I’m alive
Even though a part of me has died
You take my heart and breathe it back to life
I fall into your arms open wide
When The hurt and the healer collide

Jesus come and break my fear
Awake my heart and take my tears
Find Your glory even here
When the hurt and the healer collide


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From the first time I heard it I liked this song. I am a words person and the words to this song are beautiful. Today I was driving home from Jakob's doctors appointment and this song began to play on the radio. I realized that it's already September. How time flies when you're not really waiting on anything in particular to happen. I realized that if I had stayed pregnant I would be huge and probably a little miserable right now, but I would have had a little baby next month. Next month. The words to the song say "I'm alive, even though a part of me has died" and all of a sudden it hit me. I don't know  exactly what he meant when he wrote those words, but I realized a part of me died back at the beginning of the year. Sometimes it's still hard for me to comprehend that I actually had a child growing inside of me since I only knew I was pregnant for a couple weeks and I never got far enough along in the pregnancy to look pregnant or feel the baby move. It still seems unreal sometimes that I got pregnant. On my own. Without fertility treatments. Even more unreal that after a miracle like that I lost the baby. Tears began to pour from my eyes. My heart felt broken all over again. I mourned for the last 6 months that we've spent without our baby. I cried over the next month or so when I will have to deal with the pain of knowing our due date comes and goes without a sweet little addition to our family. Yet, even in the pain of the moment I was so grateful to know *the* healer. The loss of a baby could make anyone bitter and angry. The loss of a miracle after dealing with infertility and knowing how hard it is for some to have a baby most definitely could ruin your happiness, but it has not. God has wrapped his arms around me in the most difficult days and let me know his grace. I know that his will is perfect and that he works all things for my good. I don't know how people get through rough situations in life without his help. Yes, losing a baby hurts but when the hurt and the healer collide the healer will always win. 

Thank-you God for healing my heart day by day, moment by moment